I had the chance of going to the best law school in the country, passing one of the stringiest exams. But I blew it. I failed my last semester as an undergraduate due to a lot of reasons and then I dropped out.
I used to be that guy in school where they think "He'll really go a long way." I was that kid who shouted I'm gonna become President one day.
And now as I type away, I'm still asking myself as to what happened. Is this regret that I'm feeling? Should I throw it away?
I tried sweeping it under the rug, telling myself that I am the product of my decisions. And lawyers in this country of mine normally turn to unprincipled ass kissers. All the arguments I can muster, all to convince me of what I am right now.
And then I wept. And slept. And dreamt -- of a future that never came and a door that's now almost shut. And I hated it so much.
But the good thing about crying on it is that you get to realize how pathetic you are. You only realize what's precious when you lost them, or in my case, when you almost had them in your grasp but you did not grip enough. And they slipped to a place no one knows where.
I still haven't forgiven myself. Maybe I won't anytime soon. But I should. Instead of avoiding the regrettable feelings, I might as well embrace them. Go on with what I have right now, pave a road most people won't expect me to. Until that day comes when I can finally say, "You know what? I'm glad I did that."
Edited by GintaMan, 19 November 2015 - 04:19 PM.
"To have a dream is to struggle with reality."
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"The Old Man of the North"
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