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[Voting] Poetry Contest #32


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Poll: Poetry Contest #32 (4 member(s) have cast votes)

Which is the best?

  1. GintaMan - Freefall (1 votes [25.00%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 25.00%

  2. Sloan - Airtight (2 votes [50.00%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 50.00%

  3. Oben - Atlantis (0 votes [0.00%])

    Percentage of vote: 0.00%

  4. Red Opus - Sonnet 13 / Cloudian (1 votes [25.00%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 25.00%

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#1 Oben

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Posted 22 March 2016 - 05:08 PM

Welcome to the voting for Poetry Contest #32!

The theme was "Air", as picked by gintokichimaru, the winner of round #31.

The poll should-be self-explanatory. Please vote objectively, and fair.
You are not allowed to vote for yourself.

Please also post your opinions/criticism in the thread.
Previous rounds and winners can be found pinned in the Contest Forum and the Discussion Thread.

Here are the entries for this round:
 
 

Spoiler Freefall

 
 

Spoiler Airtight

 
 

Spoiler Atlantis

 
 

Spoiler Sonnet (maybe??) 13 - Cloudian

 
 
Voting closes 10 days from now, on April the 1st.

#2 Red Opus

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Posted 26 March 2016 - 07:42 AM

I never like to give my opinion on anything but I will this time

yet again gintaman produces some absolutely beautiful, descriptive poetry a pleasure to the eyes to read, a joy for the ears when spoken aloud. But I was a bit thrown by it at first I thought it was a poem about sleeping and dreams rather than air, and I still do, maybe it all went over my head but I'm still trying to figure out where it fits...

and that's why Sloan gets my vote, taking the "straight up bars" approach, the poem was pound cake to be sure, I'm a sucker for bars....

and oben's poem, want so far over my head I only thought I knew it did. It's leaving me with a sense of wonder, mystery..like maybe the poem wasn't finished or oben is a tease dangling the carrot infront of us. The poem seemed like the premise of a science fiction book I still want to know why Atlantis flew away
  • GintaMan likes this

#3 GintaMan

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Posted 30 March 2016 - 03:48 PM

Yeah I think I failed this time to capture the parallelism between air and life. It was actually a person taking their life, regretting it last moment and gasping for air at the end, when it was abundant on his way down. I tend to overwrite and drown the meaning here. I will take this as an opportunity to improve my future poems.

 

As always, Sloan writes wicked rhymes. I'd be glad to listen to his rhymes with beat because I think that's where he's most effective. If this was spoken poetry (which I think we are all suggesting at some point as another form of contest), this would get my vote. 

 

Oben's piece almost got my vote as well. As always, I am a fan of how Oben incorporates references and puts his own twist on them and makes it his own. I get it how the poem is like telling us that some things are not the way we thought they were. Atlantis may have flown away, and not sunk like we've always known.  We may think that this world is empty and already sunk, but who knows, maybe we can all find a better world, as hard as it can be, like grasping for air?
 

I love all forms of poems, and all of them are enough to get my vote (except mine, 'cause even I feel my poem is inadequate AF) but I voted for Red Opus because of the last 6 lines. I always look for motion in poetry (I can't really explain it, but the energy I guess?), I felt it rising through the end and staying at that altitude like "air." So kudos to Red Opus for maintaining that loyalty to the theme, playing around it and executing successfully. 

 


Edited by GintaMan, 30 March 2016 - 03:55 PM.

"To have a dream is to struggle with reality."

 

Have a taste of my pIMP Slap!

 

tiM4Zrr.gif

 

"The Old Man of the North"

 

http://38.media.tumb...EcNV1r1vglf.gif

 

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#4 Red Opus

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Posted 15 April 2016 - 07:54 PM

Wait no now I get it, the last part is a suicide attempt, betraying so In favor of the water because of your own selfishness, I wish to die, but when I did try I realized it was a mistake, I need air, air is life, but it's too late now I can no longer be saved from my folly....

I think that's the second part. still figuring out the first =P

#5 GintaMan

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Posted 18 April 2016 - 07:30 AM

I actually failed at contextualizing what led to that freefall. I was going for a dream-like sequence or like a delusion but sadly, I lacked the necessary elements for imagery at that point. 


"To have a dream is to struggle with reality."

 

Have a taste of my pIMP Slap!

 

tiM4Zrr.gif

 

"The Old Man of the North"

 

http://38.media.tumb...EcNV1r1vglf.gif

 

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#6 mantisstalker

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Posted 25 April 2016 - 12:09 AM

@Oben

Why's this been up for so long?


xwj6hphfvwez_zps37695cdc.png

Manty is a being of Chaos afterall. It was only natural he'd confuse you.

 


#7 Red Opus

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Posted 13 May 2016 - 10:36 PM

I suppose we at OMF, don't have enough interest in a poetry contest to muster votes, be they either too long, too much or too existensial (that's what makes them gold tho) we just seem to have no interest in them. There is no real way to fix this, it's not so important a cause that a mod would take it upon themselves every time a new contest is up to look after the logistics of it, pinning it, making announcements etc....and everytime its time to vote to remind people to vote or would be bothersome to suggest one do this...

#8 Oben

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Posted 14 May 2016 - 07:02 AM

I just wanted to wait for more votes than entries, at least. But I'll close it this evening.



#9 Oben

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Posted 14 May 2016 - 05:55 PM

Voting is closed.

Sloan wins the Poetry Contest, the next round will open once he picks a new theme. I might sort out some stuff first though.


 

Sloan also hasn't been online since two months, so maybe I'll just pick a theme if he doesn't respond.






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