Jump to content


Photo

[Voting] Poetry Contest #35


  • Please log in to reply
8 replies to this topic

Poll: Poetry Contest #35 (9 member(s) have cast votes)

Which is the best?

  1. linny - pumpkin time (2 votes [22.22%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 22.22%

  2. Grimjagger - Pumpkin Society (0 votes [0.00%])

    Percentage of vote: 0.00%

  3. Red Opus - [Untitled] (0 votes [0.00%])

    Percentage of vote: 0.00%

  4. mantisstalker - Poe the Pumpkin Man (2 votes [22.22%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 22.22%

  5. diezdragon - Finally (2 votes [22.22%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 22.22%

  6. Oben - The Silly Ballad of the Pumpkin and the Moon (3 votes [33.33%] - View)

    Percentage of vote: 33.33%

Vote Guests cannot vote

#1 Oben

Oben

    Sixpack

  • Blessed by Uglypuff
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 11307 posts

User's Awards

         2   

Posted 03 November 2016 - 02:32 PM

Welcome to the voting for Poetry Contest #34!

The theme was "Pumpkins", as picked by mantisstalker, the winner of round #34.

The poll should-be self-explanatory. Please vote objectively, and fair.
You are not allowed to vote for yourself.

Please also post your opinions/criticism in the thread.
Previous rounds and winners can be found pinned in the Contest Forum and the Discussion Thread.

Here are the entries for this round:
 



Spoiler pumpkin time

 
 

Spoiler Pumpkin Society

 
 

Spoiler

 
 

Spoiler Poe the Pumpkin Man

 
 

Spoiler Finally

 
 

Spoiler The Silly Ballad of the Pumpkin and the Moon

 
 
Voting closes on November 20th.


Edited by Oben, 18 November 2016 - 11:39 AM.


#2 Red Opus

Red Opus

    Ghost

  • Blessed by Uglypuff
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 2130 posts

User's Awards

5    3   

Posted 03 November 2016 - 03:34 PM

Shout to diezopus for bringing the fire
  • diezdragon likes this

#3 diezdragon

diezdragon

    Protagonist of Life

  • Blessed by Uglypuff
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 1486 posts
  • LocationJapan

User's Awards

3      

Posted 04 November 2016 - 12:45 AM

xD Well, I mean it is kind of the Halloween round, so yeah.. might've taken it a bit too far by making it a kid, yeah

 

It does feel extremely weird that everyone else has funny and/or clever poems, and then here I come with my horror story.

 

So as always I'll just post some of my personal impressions, which may or may not include actual criticism (partially depending on how lazy I am). Yeah, I know I'm bad at this, but we gotta fill this thread up you know.

 

linny - I don't know why, felt very nice to read. Very nice observational poem with nice rhythm. I don't know why I liked it so much, it just felt like I was reading a story, a picture-book maybe, about pumpkins; as various imagines kept popping into my mind as I was reading. Very little to question and much to praise, in particular the quirky feel. My pick.

 

Grimmjagger - The grammar/spelling felt kinda off at times, but overall a good poem with a clever conclusion. What kinda bothers me is that it seems contradicting or somewhat hard to understand sometimes, with particular the perspective being hard to follow (who "we", "they" are) at times. Oh, I just noticed you were going for "trick or t(h)reats" in that last paragraph as well which is cool.

 

Red Opus - For someone who has visited Starbucks maybe 3 times in my life, I felt I could connect surprisingly much with this poem. I think it has a very cozy feeling to it, especially with the slow punctuation of the latter half (though that could also be hesitation). Also, drinking a beard sounds both hilariously fitting and fun; maybe because of the hipsters.

 

Mantisstalker - I love these long story-telling poems. It feels clever in both structure and story, with build-up all the way through to finally present the origin of those snot-nosed dressed-up brats haunting our doorsteps once every year. Absolutely adore it.

 

Oben - As I already said I love these kinds of poems, especially when they have a great mix between an interesting story and a slight humorous approach like this one and Mantis'. Not much else to say other than that I found it very "comfortable" (in lack of a better word) to read. 


Fool's gold can always buy a fool's services.

 

Spoiler Retired fool quotes

#4 mantisstalker

mantisstalker

    Exorcist

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 4122 posts
  • LocationDessert Bluffs

User's Awards

2   

Posted 07 November 2016 - 06:01 AM

There was a lot of material relating to the wasting of food as its used for decoration. As an environmental student this rubs me in all the right ways~

 

I'll make a couple of comments later but for now I'll toss a vote for Oben. He might be an infuriating German with a good taste in profile pictures but his silly story took my fancy.


xwj6hphfvwez_zps37695cdc.png

Manty is a being of Chaos afterall. It was only natural he'd confuse you.

 


#5 Oben

Oben

    Sixpack

  • Blessed by Uglypuff
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 11307 posts

User's Awards

         2   

Posted 18 November 2016 - 11:40 AM

Voting extended till sunday, someone who hasn't voted yet please break the tie ^^



#6 mantisstalker

mantisstalker

    Exorcist

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 4122 posts
  • LocationDessert Bluffs

User's Awards

2   

Posted 18 November 2016 - 11:34 PM

Yo @linny care to break the tie? I can ask some catroomers to cast a vote but since they're people I know I'd rather it someone else so it doesn't seem bias. 

 

Anyway, exams are done and I'm trapped inside because all the floors are wet so I don't really have a reason to keep putting this off.

 

linny- So I'm not really sure how to put my thoughts into so many words than to say overall it was a well done poem. It fit theme of general poem writing well and was just nice to read. However the last part really threw me off as you were talking about them being wasted as decorations then jumped to wanting to be inside them. Like it was still a nice verse but didn't sit with the overall design and would have been better placed in a poem that was perhaps being a bit more surreal? Otherwise I liked it and only had that to complain about.

 

Grimjagger- As Diez mentioned the grammar makes it hard to follow. I mean I can see a lot of the time what you were wanting to say but because its a poem it really throws off the flow and I'd have to edit it before trying to read it again to make it work. Now Oben has mentioned grammar mistakes are an issue in these contests and in this case it does really hinder the experience of your work so I'd suggest next time you either take extra care with it or otherwise ask one of us for help during the submission phase. But it is nice to see new people around and I look forward to seeing how you go with time.

 

Red Opus- You've got me suffering from PTS after reading this. Might not have been Starbucks but I have too many memories of my ex and coffee shops  :unsure: But it was short and sweet. Nice and quirky I guess? Not really sure on the word I'd use to describe it but I did enjoy it. I'm actually surprised how well 'idk' fit into the piece as I thought the reader might end up stumbling on the word but I suppose its such a well used acronym its just normal to us at this point.

 

Mine- I haven't really written a story based poem before so it was new I guess. Wasn't as well executed as I would have liked but I ended up making things up as I went so it was fun to write. About all the inspiration I had was an idea of a guy wearing a pumpkin on his head. 

 

Diezdragon- Always feel bad when it comes to voting as I bully you to get your butt into gear and enter but never end up voting for you... It was my second choice however if that means anything. The writing style is very quirky and something I wish I was good at. Still under the impression the kid got her head made into a jack-o-lantern so to me its pretty dark but hey whatever, was the Halloween round. 

 

Oben- The one I voted for mostly as it told a story and brought to mind how I spent my Halloween's as a kid. Well, I mean, I never made the moon into a pumpkin but I was a sucker for stories and would spend time listening to them or making them up. I'm not sure what to say other than it was weird and well done. I commend your word smithing skills  :P


xwj6hphfvwez_zps37695cdc.png

Manty is a being of Chaos afterall. It was only natural he'd confuse you.

 


#7 linny

linny

    Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 10 posts
  • Locationbetween zero and one

Posted 19 November 2016 - 04:26 PM

I went with Oben. Love the thought that a pumpkin's wish would to replace the moon! How visible and enduring it must seem to a jack-o-lantern, who rots so quickly!

 

I'll take my phony-professor cap off now!

 

Glad I checked in to break the tie, next time I'll be more proactive  :hurr:

 


  • mantisstalker likes this

#8 Oben

Oben

    Sixpack

  • Blessed by Uglypuff
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 11307 posts

User's Awards

         2   

Posted 22 November 2016 - 03:23 PM

And the winner of the Poetry Contest... is me!

 

Next round will be up later this week, I need to think of something cool.


  • azer_moli and Grimmjagger like this

#9 Grimmjagger

Grimmjagger

    Warrior

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 778 posts
  • LocationCaNdY fAcToRy

Posted 22 November 2016 - 07:51 PM

And the winner of the Poetry Contest... is me!

 

Next round will be up later this week, I need to think of something cool.

Congrats on the win :party2:


  • mantisstalker likes this
ualodp966ca.jpeg
Follow my stories!
https://onemangaforu...agger-magazine/
SLAYERS AND SHINIGAMI NO TORA
 
https://onemangaforu...1-snake-tongue/
SNAKE TONGUE




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users